This past year has been one of growth in so many ways.....emotionally, physically, artistically....you name the area of my life and it has had a profound shift occur this past year or so.
The one area that has grown in leaps and bounds has been my ability and desire to love myself for who/what/how I am. Accepting my faults, understanding the fears and hurts and trusting that I am just where I am supposed to be and that place is perfect for me.
For many, many, many years I heard "you ruin everything". In fact, I heard it so much that I believed it and took it to heart and allowed that often spoken comment to dictate how I felt about me and how I thought everyone else felt about me. What I have learned is that some people need to make you feel less than, some people need to say hurtful things, some people need to believe what they say about you because that's how they "get by". It is my choice to accept it or not and it only took me a lifetime to realize that by accepting their beliefs I was doing myself no favors and I was not allowing me a space to see that I am NOT who/what they say/think/believe that I am.
I am fortunate that I have my Daddy's kind, generous, loving and caring nature. That he passed on to me a sense of loyalty to family and those that I love and who love and care about me. I received these gifts from him and those gifts can never be taken away, diminished or erased by someone's need to lash out, be nasty or try to diminish me in my eyes.
Am I perfect? No, but who among us can call themselves perfect? I am learning to accept things as they are, I am learning to embrace who I am and I am learning that I can't change the way a person thinks, acts or responds to me. My job is making me the best me I can be, my job is understanding that if someone needs to use me as their scapegoat that's on them and not on me.
We spent time over the holidays with very special people in my life and I learned the biggest lesson of the year during that 4 days......family can be about love, time together and serenity.
Hoping you had a wonderful holiday and that 2014 will be one of blessings, abundance and love.